Previous Status Reports Here's the Latest... Sunday, August 23 1998
Just a couple weeks of summer left, and for once I'm looking forward to it. Fall is my favorite season of the year anyway, but I'm also especially glad to see it coming this year for two reasons. First, it will mean cooler and drier weather which I love. The heat and
humidity hasn't been too bad this year, but I'll still be glad to see the last of it. The weather forecast calls for some more this week so I guess we're not done with it yet. Second, for obvious reasons I'm eager to have the next five months over and done with. Every little milestone that signals time going by gives me a little boost. Every time four more months of chemo stretching in front of me seems like an eternity, I try and remember that I have made it through the first two months and thus a third of the treatment pretty well. I also remember that four months ago I was on my trip to the Southwest and that really wasn't that long ago, despite all the earth shattering stuff that has occurred in my life since!So that's where I am today - four treatments down and eight to go. Since my last treatment was delayed by low blood counts, I had to come home from my vacation a day and a half early for treatment number four. However, we had a wonderful time on vacation, and thanks to my skipped pre-vacation treatment, I felt really good the whole time we were away which allowed me to enjoy myself a lot more than I might have if I were feeling lousy. We sailed with my Dad, rode our bikes, relaxed, ate out at expensive restaurants almost every night and generally had a great time. The place we stayed in was beautiful and right on the water. We saw some spectacular moonrises over the harbor from the beach right outside our window. We also decided that when all my treatment is finished in February (chemo and radiation), we will be returning to the same place for another trip. I am counting the days!
Treatment number four was the hardest one for me so far, and I'm finding that in general going for treatment is getting harder for me both physically and mentally. I am trying to work on the mental part of things in hopes that this will help with the physical. My general pattern seems to be as follows -
1.) Go in on treatment day and spend two hours getting treatment. Battle with anticipatory nausea.
2.) Go home, and feel kind of ill but not too bad for a few hours. Eat dinner and get pretty bad heartburn.
3.) Around bedtime, lay down to go to sleep, but by this time the drugs have made me agitated and jittery. Toss and turn but don't sleep. This last time around I was up till 5 AM. Finally, get some much needed sleep.
4.) Feel somewhat weak and queasy the next two days, but bearable. Deal with difficulties eating and other general digestive problems.
5.) Day three: wake up feeling awful. Eat breakfast feeling awful. Sit around feeling awful. Try and get in at least one dog walk.
before the worst of the awfulness kicks in. End up in bed most of the afternoon feeling somewhat like I have been run over by a truck. Nap a lot. Reassure myself that tomorrow things will get better.
6.) Day four: wake up feeling somewhat better. Not a great day, but able to do dog walks and function on a level comparable to a normal person.
7.) Get steadily better until a week after treatment, by which time I feel close to 100%. Feel really good for the next week until getting whomped again.So with this pattern in place, I find myself not at all looking forward to treatment. Especially since I'm usually at my best point of feeling good right before I go in for it. Hey I feel great! Give me some of that stuff that's going to make me feel awful! Thanks so
much! It does help to think of each treatment as progress towards a very desirable goal. I have sort of a mental staircase in my mind's eye with 13 steps leading up to the famous Club Remission. Each treatment is another step up that staircase closer to my goal, with the last step being my radiation treatments. I am getting there slowly but surely!Last Monday I also began getting my magic Neupogen shots, which basically is like putting George and Mary on steroids so they can crank out white blood cells round the clock. I have to get a shot a day for at least 10 days after each treatment from now on. We did
manage to arrange for me to get my shots at my Northampton medical clinic, which keeps me from having to drive to Springfield every day. It's a five minute drive vs. a twenty minute drive so it makes a difference. Other than the hassle of going to get the shots, they have been pretty easy for me so far. They don't hurt much and my only side effects have been a very small amount of muscle soreness which is hardly noticeable. My blood test this Thursday after four days of these shots had my white blood cell count through the roof at 11.3, up from 5.1 before my last treatment, and the low of 2.3 a week prior to that. Those white blood cells are havin' a big party! Woo hoo!Tomorrow, Shaz is coming with me when I get my shot so she can observe and learn how to give them to me herself. We are going to New York to apartment sit for her sister next week, during a four day stretch when I am supposed to be getting my shots. Rather than cancel our trip, they told us Shari could learn how to do it. I plan to buy her a little nurse's cap to wear. Anyway, I can't give the shots to myself because they give them to me in the back of my upper arm, in the part I refer to as my "arm flab". You can't really reach it properly to do it to yourself. I'll have to be careful about not making Shari mad right before shot giving time though. The shots are given with a really small needle, but they can sting a bit if you don't push the drug in slowly. We'll probably have Shari do it just for this trip and then go back to the clinic afterwards, but it will be a good thing for her to know since I gotta do this until December and I'm sure they'll be other times we'll want to get a way for a few days. I even have to go in on weekends, so no rest for George and Mary. However, I'm getting on a first name basis with all the nurses at my clinic.
Well, that's about all for now. I'm feeling good and expect to continue feeling good until treatment number five, which is scheduled for this Thursday. At least I don't have to wonder if my blood counts will be up to it any more! Two more treatments and I'll be
halfway done! Yay!!!Carpe Diem
2:15 PM
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